2020-04-18 翻譯:笑笑
【節選自:2013-12-20】
問：
It seems to me that most of my friends and me included have the least patience with our mothers.
似乎，我的大部分朋友，也包括我，對於我們的母親，都是最沒有耐心的，並且……
巴夏：
Well, what part of yourself that is represented by the mother are you impatient with?
對於你來說，你母親象徵著哪一部分的你呢？並且，你對這部分的自己沒有耐心呢？
Do you understand it's a reflection, yes?
你知道，你母親只是你（部分意識）的一個影射，是吧？
問：
Yes! Yes! I know chose my mom.
是的！是的！我知道選擇了我媽媽
巴夏：
Well, I don't just mean that !
我說的，不僅僅是這個意思
I saying there is a reflection in you of a part of yourself that you're equating to her vibration that you are impatient with
你對一部分的自己，沒有耐心，你將這一部分的你等同於你母親的頻率，並投射到她身上
You're impatient with an aspect of yourself.
你是對於自己的某一個面向，沒有耐心
The only reason you would be impatient with someone else is that you're impatient with the aspect of yourself that the someone else symbolizes to you that you're afraid you contain.
你會對某人不耐煩的唯一原因，就是：你對自己的某一面向不耐煩，害怕自己包含這樣的一部分，而對方卻只是這一部分的象徵性人物
Do you understand?
你能明白嗎？
問：
So every time I see her, and she is in a bad mood, which happens a lot,
每次我見她，她都沒好心情，而這種情況又常常發生
and I don't have patience with her.
於是，我也就沒啥耐心了
巴夏：
Why do you need patience? That's what I'm saying.
你為什麼需要耐心呢？這才是我的意思
If you understand that her mood has nothing to do with you and you stop taking it personally.
如果你知道，她的心情，跟你一點關係都沒有，並且，你也不再因為她的心情，而影響自己的心情
You don't need patience.
那麼，你就不需要耐心
Because it has nothing to do with you.
因為，這真的跟你一點關係都沒有
You'll just look at her doing whatever she does, have compassion to realize that she may be caught up in your own fears,
你只需要帶著同情心，看著她做她自己的事，並且意識到：她可能陷入了她自己的恐懼中
But you can also simultaneously have compassion for yourself and realize that her process and her issues and her belief systems and the things that she's caught up have nothing to do with you
同時，你也可以同情一下自己，告訴自己：她經歷的過程，她遇到的問題，她的信念系統，以及她身陷的事情，跟你一點關係都沒有
And therefor you don't need patience
因此，你也就不需要有耐心
And therefore, if you don't need patience, you will never become impatient
而如果你不需要耐心，那麼，你就永遠不會變得“不耐煩”
You will enjoy the moment for what it is, see it for what it is, experience it in the way that you prefer to regardless of how she may be experiencing it.
你將會享受此時此刻，欣賞此情此景，以你喜好的方式，體驗當下的境況，而不論她是如何經歷這一切的
And because you're experiencing it in a curious and magical and exciting and interesting way,
當你帶著好奇、激動的心，以有趣、神奇的方式，體驗著當下這一切
What would you need patience for?
那麼，你還需要耐心幹啥嘞？
You're having fun even if she's having a miserable time
你可以 樂不思蜀，即使她 苦不堪言
So don't take it personally,
不要把她的壞心情“照單全收”
Don't agree that you are like her in that way
不要認為你和她是同一個樣
Do you understand?
你明白了嗎？
問：
Yes!
明白了！
巴夏：
Because that's what you're getting angry about
因為，這就是你生氣的原因
You have a belief that you're like her in that way,
你有一個信念，認為：你在這一方面，像她一樣
You don't have to believe that
但是，你沒必要這麼認為
She may have taught to think that way, but you don’t have to believe it.
她可能教過你這麼想事情，但你沒必要相信她那一套
Correct?
對吧？
問：
Yes!
對！
巴夏：
So, don't agree with it.
所以，不要認同她的那一套
It's the same idea, the same analogy,
同樣的道理，我做個比喻
as someone walking up to you on the street when you're wearing a blue outfit and say: I really hate your red outfit
當你穿著一身藍色的衣服，走在路上，這時候有個人走過來，跟你說：“你這一襲紅衣，我真的很討厭！”
You would look at them like they're crazy, and goes: what does that go with me. I'm not wearing red?
你會看著對方，想她是不是有毛病，並且，回答道：“這跟我有什麼關係，我又沒穿紅色衣服？！”
It's the same thing.
二者是同一回事
It has nothing to do with you
這跟你一點關係都沒有
Stop making it have something to do with you
不要再把跟你沒關係的事情，扯上關係了
Because you're the one doing that
因為，這麼做的人，是你
She can't do it to you
這事，她做不了
You're doing it to yourself
你只能“自作自受”
And that what the impatience comes in
於是，你就開始“心煩意擾”了
Because you realize you're doing something to yourself that you don't prefer to do
因為，你意識到：你在對自己做一件你不希望對自己做的事
So you get angry and resentful at her as a projection of the anger and resentment you have toward yourself for doing something to yourself that you don't prefer to do.
於是，你對自己產生了憤怒與怨恨，而後把這一切投射到你母親身上，所以，你才會怒火中燒，對她心生怨恨
So take responsibility for your part of it, and don't take her side of it personally
所以，承擔起你自己那一部分的責任，並且，不再把她那一方的責任攬到自己身上
And then you will balance out
然後，你就能（身心）平衡了
And it won't matter what she does
她再做什麼，對你都沒影響了（都無關緊要）
because it has nothing to do with you
因為，這跟你一點關係都沒有
And then you can have the compassion to perhaps reflect to her that she can choose to change by seeing an example in you of your change
而後，你也還可以帶著愛心（慈悲、同情心），以自我改變為例，向她“映射”出她也可以選擇做出改變
But you have to allow her not to change. It has to be an unconditional love
但你也必須允許她“不做改變”，你需要給予她無條件的愛
But you start by unconditionally loving yourself enough, to not adopt and accept things you know have nothing to do with you
但在此之前，你需要先給予自己足夠多的無條件的愛，不再接受和採納那些你知道跟你毫無關係的事物
Do you understand?
你明白了嗎？
問：
Yes!
明白！
巴夏：
Does this help you?
這對你有幫助嗎？
問：
Yes! Thank you!
是的！謝謝你！
